We're so over we need a new word for over.

So. I'm not quite sure how things got back to this. Almost exactly a year ago, the same stuff was going down. The difference is that back then I cared. This time I'm just angry. I was going to use this to vent, but I've decided that I'm above it. I'm above you both. The truth is that I don't need either of you, I never did, and to rehash everything is both immature and unnecessary. So we'll leave it at this: yet again, there's a fresh start on my horizon. I thank you both for being the motivation I needed. I want to be nothing like you.

This will be quick. There's been too much going on to explain it all now, so hopefully I'll keep regularly updating this. I'm up for a new job that will mean more money, benefits, and regular hours. I'm really looking forward to it and everything that it will bring. I recognize that part of it means I'll be staying here for the foreseeable future, but that's okay. I'm moving forward, and to me, that's all that matters right now.

Things with the family have been strained, for reasons I both can and can't post here. Matthew was arrested this past week for trying to steal a car in Potsdam. His bail was set at $10,000 which means no one's going there to get him out. Part of the family believes he needs to sit there and perhaps learn some lessons, whereas myself believes that all Matt needed all along was a little bit of love and understanding. It's hard to watch someone you love fail so miserably, but I suppose they're right. He's got to pay the consequences for his mistakes.

That's as much as I can do right now. I just took a brief moment to read through the text messages Ben's been sending me over the last ten days or so and I just had to laugh. He has no grasp on reality whatsoever. You can never tell when he's telling the truth because he wavers so much in his emotions; in one he says that he would always be there for me, even after all the things we've been through, and then in another about a week later, he tells me that the world would be a better place without me in it. He's so different now. Or, maybe he's the same as he always was. Either way I can't save him. He doesn't even want to save himself.