Such is life.

This past week has been rough. No ifs, ands or buts about it. I lost the more lucrative of my two jobs, and then today found out that the NYS Department of Labor is one big ball of stupid. I was told, in no uncertain terms, that it doesn't matter if you go into work for 15 minutes one day- that 15 minutes counts as a day of work, and therefore decreases your unemployment benefits by one quarter. So, hypothetically speaking, I could go into work for 15 minutes, on four different days, equalling a total of 1 hour of work for the week, and still not receive any benefits whatsoever. I understand that there are a lot of people out there who don't want to work; they'd rather sit back and do nothing and receive a check every week. But I'm not one of them. More importantly, it's almost impossible to survive on what they give you in a month anyway, without another form of income. Why aren't they encouraging people to work, rather than penalizing people like myself, who want to work as much as possible, by taking away what little help I am entitled to receive?

My father is really pushing this moving idea. I think if there was any possible way for me to stay around here and be successful, he would be touting that as well; but at this point, it's just not working. I've been working two dead-end jobs for awhile now, scraping by, living with him and not really having a life of my own. I think I've used my family as an excuse for so long now, that I'm still finding it hard to truth. And the truth is that, besides them, there really is nothing here for me. I need to finish school (which I can't technically do until I'm 24 anyway, since they don't considering you financially independent from your parents until that age), and get on the fast track towards finding a career. I looked online today at the NYU and Denver Publishing Institute programs and got excited just reading about all of the classes. And that's how it should be. I don't mind doing mindless jobs to earn money, as long as it's in an effort to get where I really want to be. But I haven't even been doing that; working minimum wage jobs for fifty hours a week is a fast track to NOWHERE.

I'm hoping that Sam losing her job as well will give her the push she needs to move with me. We talked a little bit about Vermont yesterday; we have family there, and as luck would have it, an apartment across from my cousin's condo is opening up soon. The rent is a bit much for the two of us: $900-$1200 a month. But even in us just talking about it, I could see she was a bit excited to move into the next phase of her life. She's just as stuck as I am, if not more. She never moved away for college, or left home for a job, so she's literally been here her whole life. I'm not sure she's got it in her to leave, but I'm hoping that if we go tandem on this, and live within a two hour range of home, she'll make the leap.

Anyway. Enough venting for the day. We're going to visit Sam for a bit, and then I've got to head into work to talk to Garrett and Lisa about a way to work my schedule around this unemployment bullshit. Then it's home to set up shop at the kitchen table in what I've affectionally been calling "Resume Row". Pray to the career Gods for me, guys. I need all the help I can get.