I see another cup of coffee in my future.

I'm tired. I didn't realize how much I enjoyed having that little summer vacation from work. I went from one job to three, quite quickly, and it's shaping up to look like I'll be working an average of 50 hours a week. It's almost impossible to work more than that without passing out from exhaustion or throwing abox cutter at people out of frustration. I'm excited to be back at the bookstore; I'm in my element there. Hacketts is tough because there's really only four of us working, and three of us are supervisors. The problem lies in that because there's only three of us, none of us can ever really have more than a day off. Dad called me last night trying to plan an impromptu Ottawa weekend with Joe and Jess and there's just no way. I'd need at least two weeks notice before I could pull something like that off. And even then it's a long shot. But I'm so desperate to get the hell out of here for a few days that I've been scheming up ways to make it work all day. If only.

I'm still feeling good about everything. I hate when I'm in a great mood and then something happens that reminds me of something sad. I was looking at pictures on Facebook last night of Shane's son, Gage, and I'm friends with his brother on MySpace. Then I went to bed and dreamt about him; he was still alive, and we were best friends. I've had similar dreams about Christian where I wake up, and for those first moments, I think the dream is real. It's almost harder than just living with the day to day ache.

I've started another journal, a written one, for more mundane things. I know what you're thinking: how could it possibly get any more mundane than what I write here? Trust me, it's possible. I think it's going to be more of a planning journal; a way to write about all of the things I want to accomplish. I keep dreaming about Ithaca and Vermont and all of these places I'd love to live, just for a little while. I've put so many things on the back burner these last two years that I'm only doing myself a disservice by not dreaming about the possibilities.

Anyway, it's time to get ready for work. I'm thinking that if I can keep up this non-smoking thing that in a few months, I'm going to reward myself with one of the new ereaders. I've been comparing the Sony and the Kindle all morning, and I know that Apple is rumored to be coming out with something similar before Christmas. Yay for more books and less smoking!